Two More Randomly-Named Monsters (BX monsters)

See last post. @NateTreme is putting together a free zine of 100 tweet-length descriptions people have read, which looks sweet. I wrote the Chittering Skull Fly, while my partner wrote the description for the Pestilent Glow Weasel. The stats and Geegaw table are all mine, I hope they're useful for your game. The geegaw table in particular is well-suited for other trashbaby monsters like goblins.

Chittering Skull Fly

Fist-sized adult form inhabits a skeleton. Cranial cavity provides resonance for their tymbal clicks, fast enough to simulate the common tongue. Builds silk "tendons" to marionette the skeleton. Slow, deliberate movements, trading speed for torque.

(as Skeleton)

Armour Class: 7 [12]
Hit Dice: 1* (4hp)
Attacks: 1 × weapon (1d6 or by weapon, roll damage with advantage)
THAC0: 19 [+0]
Movement: 45’ (15’)
Saving Throws: D12 W13 P14 B15 S16 (as 1 HD monster)
Morale: 8
Alignment: Neutral
XP: 13
Number Appearing: 2d6 (5d6)
Treasure Type: C

• Lair: Roughly half of the 5d6 flies found in a lair will be naked, the rest will be skeleton-piloting flies.
• Slow and Strong: Makes damage rolls with advantage (roll damage dice twice and use the highest). Can break through doors with 1d3 rounds of effort even if held shut with iron spikes; can overcome hold portal spells by 1st-level casters (i.e. as a 4 HD creature). Can carry up to 200 lb (2,000 coins).

(as naked Fly)

Armour Class: 9 [12]
Hit Dice: 1 (4hp)
Attacks: 1 × bite (1 damage)
THAC0: 19 [+0]
Movement: 45’ (15’) / 75’ (25’) flying
Saving Throws: D12 W13 P14 B15 S16 (as 1 HD monster)
Morale: 6
Alignment: Neutral
XP: 10
Number Appearing: 1d3 (5d6)
Treasure Type: C

• Lair: Roughly half of the 5d6 flies found in a lair will be naked, the rest will be skeleton-piloting flies. Treasure in a lair used to be the grave goods buried with each skeleton. The flies have no use for nonmagical treasure, but understand humans enough to trade with them.

Pestilent Glow Weasel

A clever child-sized mustelid. Carrion & refuse feeder, it's skills as a scrounger & thief are useful to some. Proudly filthy, notorious for spreading disease with bites & scratches, its fur is covered in bioluminescent fungus which it eats during lean times

Armour Class: 9 [10]
Hit Dice: 2 (9hp)
Attacks: 1 × bite or scratch (1d3 + disease), or 1 × junk-sword (1d8, breaks on a natural 8)
THAC0: 18 [+1]
Movement: 90’ (30’)
Saving Throws: D12 W13 P14 B15 S16 (as 2 HD monster)
Morale: 5
Alignment: Chaotic
XP: 20
Number Appearing: 1d6 (1d6)
Treasure Type: V, plus one roll each on Geegaws, below

• Disease: Bite has a 1-in-6 chance of infecting the target (save versus poison). Incubation time is 2 days, followed by up to a month of fever, vomiting, swollen joints and lymph nodes, and purple rashes around the infected area (-2 to all rolls, naturally heal at half the normal rate). The disease has a 1-in-6 chance of death, which occurs in 2d6 days after onset.
• Immunity: Immune to most poisons and diseases. Any specific poison/disease has only a 1-in-6 chance of affecting them as a species, in addition to any saving throw called for.
• Luminescent: Fungus growing on fur casts light in a 10' radius. Removed fungus keeps glowing for 1d6 days, but can be cultured on other mammalian hair or fur.
• Scrounger: Can find (but not remove) treasure traps, hear noise, and pick pockets as a 6th-level thief. Due to their luminescence, they are terrible at hiding, and carry too many scrounged geegaws to move silently.
  • Find Traps: 40%
  • Hear Noise: 3-in-6
  • Pick Pockets: 45%

Geegaws

1. Snapped wand, cerulean magic sparks at the break pose a fire hazard.
2. Beetle-shell lamellar "armour". Offers no protection, but quite pretty.
3. Mouldy loaf of bread. If consumed, equal odds of curing or causing disease, as the spell).
4. Slingshot and five dried dung-pellets.
5. Mangled paintbrushes and a bottle of vinegared egg yolk.
6. Diary of encountered fungi. Can answer a single question about every fungus encountered, 2-in-6 chance the answer is wrong.
7. Lamp oil stolen from humans, good for deep-frying.
8. Copper amulet covered in bite marks.
9. Vial of musk, a gift from a lover.
10. A spare junk-sword, 1d8 damage but breaks on a natural 8.
11. Bulky goggles, protect eyes but impede vision.
12. Badly magnetised compass, needle points a cardinal direction other than north. Roll d3: 1 = east, 2 = south, 3 = west.
13. A soft sugary roll, perfectly preserved in some sort of transparent film.
14. A clay jar full of live crickets.
15. moth-eaten linen shawl, bright yellow, embroidery now illegible.
16. A map of the dungeon level. Each secret door has a 50% chance of being known and marked, rooms only accessible by an unknown secret door are obviously not on the map.
17. A coconut goblet with silver foot and stem.
18. An Alagaësian Smuggle-Hamster, its cheeks are an extradimensional space that can hold 10 fl oz. (300 mL) of goods without showing any external bulge.
19. A pitted, wiggly-bladed dagger that glows blood-red. Nonmagical, the dagger is actually home to another bioluminescent fungus that metabolises iron, and will colonise nearby iron & steel objects.
20. Paper fortune-teller made from the torn-out sheet of a wizard's spellbook. Can do one accurate augury per person per month. Roll d8 or construct a fortune-teller with the following:
    1. Turn left.
    2. You will find riches soon.
    3. You will have good luck today.
    4. You will have bad luck today.
    5. Do a good deed today.
    6. An old friend will come calling.
    7. Love is in the air.
    8. Be careful on Tuesday.

Grinning Star-Wyrm (B/X monster)

This monster name was generated by @NateTreme's cool generator. Check out the other tweet-length monster descriptions, they're all great!

Grinning Star-Wyrm

Vestigial-winged, propels itself through vacuum through sheer plucky, can-do nature. Breathes a plume of capitalist work ethic and retail-smiles. Eats a mock meat made of ground, extruded asteroid, but sometimes cheats with the odd human.

Armour Class 0 [19]
Hit Dice 12** (54 hp)
Attacks [1 × bite (4d6), 1 tail slap (4d6)] or breath
THAC0 10 [+9]
Movement 90’ (30’) / 180’ (60’) flying
Saving Throws Death 6, Wands 7, Paralysis 8, Breath 8, Spells 10 (as 12 HD monster)
Morale 10 (4 during economic downturns)
Alignment Any
XP 2,700
Number Appearing 1 (1d4)
Treasure Type H

• Breath weapon: Cloud of stimulant gas (50’ long, 40’ wide, 20’ high). Save versus breath or be unable to rest for 2 days, or for 1 day if the grinning star-wyrm is at half-hp (27 hp) or less. This includes overnight rest necessary to heal and regain spells, and shorter rests during the day to avoid attack penalties, see Dungeon Adventuring: Resting. Characters affected are also immune to sleep for the duration, and their facial muscles tighten into an uncomfortable smile.
• Language and spells: 100%; 4 × 1st level, 4 × 2nd level, 4 × 3rd level.
• Open-Plan Office: All characters within the grinning star-wyrm's lair automatically succeed at Hear Noise rolls, but automatically fail Move Silently rolls. A silence 15' radius spell will negate this.
• Sleeping: 33%.

Typical Spells Prepared

• 1st: detect magic, purify food and water, ventriloquism¹ × 2
• 2nd: invisibility, phantasmal force¹ × 2, wizard lock
• 3rd: clairvoyance¹ × 2, haste, protection from normal missiles

¹ while in the grinning star wyrm's lair, this has a range of "anywhere else in the lair".

Sample Hoard

• 50,000 gp
• 40 necklaces. Each is a rounded rectangle made of silver, borne on a fine silver chain. Each is engraved with a tiny serial number but is otherwise blank. The first time the necklace is ever worn, parts of the rectangle magically darken to resemble a daguerrotype photo of the wearer's face. Each necklace is cursed, requiring the remove curse spell to remove.
• A mahogany box with a big button of solid ruby, and ivory dials which can be spun to show any four-digit number. Press the button and the silver necklace with that serial number will explode.
• A velvet-lined silver box, lid bears a repoussé apple tree. Holds a syringe made of platinum and rose quartz, and four glass ampoules: two potions of longevity, and two potions of cure disease (as the spell)

Tortles for OSE and other B/X clones

Tortles

They're turtle people. You have a stronger idea of what that means for your setting than whatever guff is in the monster manual.

Physical Detail (d12)

1. irregular, blotchy shell colours, almost like leopard spots
2. belly indicates sex: concave is male, convex is female
3. powerful, bone-crushing jaw
4. looong neck, as long as your torso
5. bright red belly in youth, slowly fades to orange with age
6. overlapping spurs on your forelimbs, like a pine cone or scale mail
7. upper jaw tapers straight down like a hawk's beak
8. spiny, crinkly brown head like a fallen autumn leaf
9. each scute of your shell is pale in the centre, shading to a dark border.
10. small pig-like snout
11. spiny ridge down the centre of your shell
12. light and dark lines run radially through each scute

What trinket do you carry with you? (d6)

1. a crude knife made from a sharpened clam, given to you by your youngest child.
2. your great grandmother's claw, yellowed and brittle, bound tightly to your forearm with a woven bracelet.
3. a jar of toasted seaweed you traded for. you allow yourself little snacks as a reward.
4. a fragment of speckled sea glass. it throbs in seawater.
5. tattooing needle and bright ochre inks. you are still unmarked but will be ready when the time comes.
6. a glass bottle you found floating in the sea, holding a crude map of an island you do not recognise and a letter in the human tongue pleading for help.

Stats for Old-School Essentials and other retroclones

XP Requirements. As Magic-User

Ability Score Requirements. Con 9

Languages. Alignment, Common, Lizard man

Saves. As Fighter. Saves vs wands and breath attacks are made as a Fighter 3 levels higher, due to your protective shell.

Attack. As Fighter. You can wield all weapons, but tortles usually disdain bows and crossbows in favour of slings and thrown weapons more resilient to wet environments.

Hit Dice. 1d8 per level, +3 per level after 9th.

Claws. You can make melee attacks with a hand that isn't holding anything. This deals damage as a dagger, i.e. 1d4, if the optional rule for variable weapon damage is used.

Hold Breath. You can hold your breath for 6 turns (60 minutes). Strenuous activity such as combat consumes air at twice the normal rate, or a minimum of 1 turn.

Navigator. You count as a navigator on the open ocean, reducing the chance of getting lost to 2-in-6. See Waterborne Adventuring: Losing Direction.

Shell. Your Armour Class is as plate armour, i.e. AC 3 [16]. You cannot wear armour over your body, but you can wield a shield, and can benefit from magical bracers and greaves.

Swimming. You aren't an exceptional swimmer compared to other aquatic demihumans, but you are more adept than a typical human. Whenever you negotiate an aquatic hazard, adjust your odds of success by 10% on a percentile roll, or by 2 if the referee prefers an ability check rolled on d20. See Hazards and Challenges: Swimming. Note that a single failure is unlikely to cause drowning, due to your Hold Breath ability, but subtracting 1 or more turns of available air is a possible outcome of a failed roll.

Tortle Progression

Level	XP	Hit Dice	To-Hit	Saving Throws
				Death	Wands	Paralysis	Breath	Spells
1st	0	1d8	19 [+0]	12	11	14	13	16
2nd	2,500	2d8	19 [+0]	12	11	14	13	16
3rd	5,000	3d8	19 [+0]	12	11	14	13	16
4th	10,000	4d8	17 [+2]	10	9	12	10	14
5th	20,000	5d8	17 [+2]	10	9	12	10	14
6th	40,000	6d8	17 [+2]	10	9	12	10	14
7th	80,000	7d8	14 [+5]	8	7	10	8	12
8th	150,000	8d8	14 [+5]	8	7	10	8	12
9th	300,000	9d8	14 [+5]	8	7	10	8	12
10th	450,000	9d8+3*	12 [+7]	6	5	8	5	10

* Modifiers from CON no longer apply.

---

Optional: Separation of Race and Class

If you are playing with the Advanced Fantasy Genre Rules, tortles have the following benefits.

I strongly disagree with that book's decision to adjust ability scores, and haven't provided such adjustments. Similarly, come up with your own demihuman level limits if you want to.

XP Requirements, Ability Score Requirements, Saves, Attack, Hit Dice: As your chosen class.

Languages, Claws, Hold Breath, Navigator, Swimming: As above.

Shell. As above.

Additionally, your bulk may hinder certain thief-type skills at the referee's discretion.

Your shell doesn't affect divine spellcasting, but does impede arcane spellcasting. If you belong to an arcane spellcasting class, you have half the spell slots (rounded up) that that class would normally have at your level. e.g. a 7th-level tortle Magic-User has two 1st-level slots, one 2nd-level slot, one 3rd-level slot, and one 4th-level slot.

Your shell grants you a bonus to saving throws versus wands and breath attacks. This bonus is dependent on your CON score, as follows:

• 6 or lower: No bonus
• 7-10: +2
• 11-14: +3
• 15-17: +4
• 18: +5

Other Advanced Genre Rules Class Notes

• Knight. A tortle Knight of 5th level or higher may train aquatic monsters as mounts at the referee's discretion.

• Paladin. A tortle Paladin of 4th-level or higher may summon a sacred crocodile instead of a warhorse. AC 5 [14], HD 5+5 (27 hp) Att 1 × bite (1d8), THAC0 14 [+5], MV 90’ (30’) / 90’ (30’) swimming, SV D8 W9 P10 B10 S12 (4), ML 9, AL Lawful